Choosing friends with different personalities and attributes that complement your character can be a real challenge. Here are a few guidelines that could help you make better choices in your lifetime.
There aren't many things more important than friendship. Life would not be fulfilling if there were no existence of other living beings. In fact, this is clear evidence that everyone exists to be a companion to one another; with no exclusion to our dearest pets. Friendship requires sharing a certain aspects of oneself, including being emotionally available with someone else. This makes choosing friends something to be taken with careful consideration. It is often said “show me your friends, and I will tell you who you are”; meaning the people you keep in your circle can influence you positively or negatively. Before we dive into the main question, let’s take a look at some of the ideal characteristics of a good friend.
- A friend is someone you can talk with about a problem you are facing.
- Someone who is always there when you need a hand in the good and bad times.
- Someone you can trust with your deepest secrets and in return is honest with you.
- Someone who makes you laugh or fun to be around.
The traits stated above are some of the key ones every friend should have. If someone disagrees or cannot offer this social behaviour, the individual will struggle to cultivate meaningful and long lasting friendships.
So what are the three must have traits that influence great relationships? Here they are:
The Act of Caring
Caring is showing unconditional kindness and concern for others, this is essential. This is the collection of relative skills; excellent listening skills, empathising where appropriate, ability to render support or solutions in good and bad times (don’t be that “I told you so” kind of person). If you are one of those people who have trouble celebrating other’s successes and feel envy or even resentment, this may tremble the foundation of your friendships.
Qualities of Integrity
When you are trustworthy it opens the doors to related core values such as honesty, reliability, loyalty and interrelated qualities. It is often said “Be truthful so when you have to explain yourself you won’t have to rely on a bad memory”. It takes a lot to build a relationship, sometimes a lifetime and it takes so little to break it.
Qualities of Likability
The ultimate quality needed regarding likability is solely based on self-confidence; the ability to see the humour in life and just having fun being yourself. No one likes a person that takes life too serious and can’t exchange dialogue without spelling out the negative in every situation. Life is filled with misery - that we all know, but do not want to constantly dwell on.
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People who are great to be around understand the importance of handling challenges from a proactive angle, without turning a complete blind eye to negative aspects. We all benefit from that friend who you count on to wake you up when you are in a slumber from taking life too serious.
In conclusion, what are friends for? Friends are simply for living longer and happier lives! Choose friends with different personalities and attributes that complement your character. People with close friends thrive more socially and emotionally than those without.
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Remember, everyone is different and once you take time to understand people, some may carry exceptional qualities of friendship mentioned above. Hopefully this guide will help you make better friendship decisions in your lifetime.
Here is a good book worth looking at: How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie and Dr. Arthur R. Pell, also available as a audiobook for you to listen to whilst commuting to work or your next road trips.
Did I leave out any friendship and relationship tips that have worked well for you? Please share yours in the comment box below?